Wizards of the Coast has released an official statement to clarify an ambiguous ruling troubling players. As of today, all cards revealed by Zangu, the monkey with a mirror are now officially treated as public information.
“Many in the community correctly assumed how we would be rule over Zangu and his cheeky antics,” said Wizards of the Coast spokesperson Samantha Cummings. “And even though many competitive scenes were already treating cards revealed by Zangu as public, we wanted to standardize the ruling to avoid any confusion and unnecessary debate.”
Players have already had enough time to adapt and find the optimal ways to prepare for Zangu.
“Zangu has been a breath of fresh air,” said longtime MTG enthusiast Ryan Coltrane. “MTG has always been about using the tools you’ve armed yourself with to combat variance. Obviously sometimes Zangu’s mirror betrays you way more often than your opponent. Rather than get frustrated, I always tell other players to sideboard better fruits that Zangu likes. People see he’s a monkey and think bananas are the way to go, though I’ve found success with honeydew. If you cut them into wedges, rind on, then slice the flesh vertically into what I call a ‘stegosaurus’ he’ll be on your side for the rest of the evening.”
With the overwhelming popularity of Zangu’s inclusion, Wizards of the Coast is planning to add more animals ad-nauseum, as is tradition.
“I’m excited to see what new animals Wizards of the Coast will introduce into the game,” said Zoologist Fred Klayt. “While I’m under NDA and cannot disclose anything specific, I will say that a good portion of our discussions weren’t necessarily surrounding mammals. I am however free to say that the honey badger trained to fuck up players caught cheating was shot down, much to my own dismay. If you ask me, they deserve it.”
Though some purists have house banned Zangu’s presence during games, many have found it difficult to combat the monkey’s inexplicable passion for finding and ruining games of Magic: The Gathering. In response, many of the major accessory manufacturers are busy creating anti-monkey security devices to install in one’s home to keep the staunch simian away.