In an unexpected turn of events, Zhen Zhen, a previously listless panda at the San Diego Zoo, has undergone a remarkable transformation after her diet was accidentally supplemented with Magic: The Gathering cards. The change? She’s suddenly exhibited mating behaviors for the first time in years, much to the astonishment of zoologists and TCG enthusiasts alike.
The incident occurred when a well-meaning patron dropped an MTG deck into Zhen Zhen’s enclosure. “At first, we were concerned about the potential dietary issue,” shared lead zoologist Dr. Herbert Shuffle. “But then Zhen Zhen started sorting the cards by color and set before eating them. We knew something truly extraordinary was happening when she began to twerk.”
Within days, Zhen Zhen began exhibiting unprecedented levels of energy and an enthusiasm for courtship, baffling experts who had tried everything from mood music to Tinder for Pandas. “It’s incredible,” Dr. Shuffle remarked. “She’s building decks, challenging other animals to duels, and for the first time ever, showing interest in her mate, Po. We even caught them ‘exchanging decks,’ if you know what I mean.”
The MTG community has embraced Zhen Zhen’s story, with some players calling it “the feel-good story of the year” and others questioning if eating the MTG might also get them laid. “I always knew Magic cards had a special power,” said local player Jonny Drawfour. “If they can get a panda in the mood, maybe they’ll help me get a date, too. It helps if you chop them up and pour milk over them to eat like a kind of cereal.”
While conservationists are excited about the implications for panda breeding programs worldwide, they’ve cautioned against introducing TCG diets to other species. “Please don’t start feeding Pokémon cards to the penguins,” pleaded Dr. Shuffle. “The last thing we need is a bunch of birds trying to evolve.”
As for Zhen Zhen, her keepers have promised to keep her stocked with the latest MTG sets, citing not only her improved mood but also a newfound sparkle in her eye every time she draws a mythic rare.