SALEM, Mass. — Flyer for a new local game store, holding a Modern tournament in order to increase awareness, was distributed this week. While players were eager to attend and visit the town’s new, and only local game store, the flyer’s text was completely illegible.
“We’ve been eagerly anticipating a new LGS to open up ever since the old one was shut down,” said local MTG enthusiast Michael Jessings, 24. “When rumors began circulating about a new one opening soon we were obviously thrilled. Granted, they did a really great job at advertising their grand opening, putting out all kinds of ads on the internet and local publications. The only issue is that they keep using their highly stylistic graffiti style logo for everything and kept telling people to ‘use google’.”
Local Magic players decided to get together and ascertain the name of the store.
“I think it says Zoitna,” said Jessings. “Nah, that’s definately 7ojt.NA,” said Bill Harper, one of Jessings’ friends. Harper, Jessings, and a few others took turns making suggestions as to what the overly ornate logo for the business could be, only to find their Google searches for each suggestion to turn up zero results related to a local game store.”
Not to be thwarted, the players decided to look for the location for the town’s new LGS the old-fashioned way.
“Turns out Bill is good at creating search grids, for whatever reason. So, we divvied up the town for an analogue search, per se. We thought it was going to be easy since all we had to do was find a building with the logo on it. However, since the logo was graffiti and being that every bare wall in Salem already has some, our search was for naught.”
At time of press, the friends were able to finally determine the name of the local game store but were shocked to discover the name had been Bob’s Cards all along.