NEW BRITAIN, Conn. — In response to the popular Stanley 10-Compartment Organizer, adopted by Magic: The Gathering players due to its unintended use as a case to house multiple decks, Stanley has announced a new 10-Compartment Organizer that will fit ten 10-compartment organizers.
“The feedback was clear, the original 10-Compartment Organizer just wasn’t big enough,” said Stanley Spokesperson Stan Lee. “Due to its rugged design and removable trays it’s the perfect accoutrement for the avid EDH player. Its only limitation is the number of decks it can hold. Our design team was tasked with solving this issue, which they did in about three and a half minutes.”
The new design is identical to the original 10-Compartment Organizer built by Stanley, but large enough to house the organizers themselves, ten in total.
“Some may say that it’s pointless to carry that many decks around. You ever seen those movies where the bad ass opens the trunk of their car before the big fight and they have an arsenal of weapons to choose from? Nobody asks them why they need so many guns! Now imagine it’s Magic: The Gathering decks instead. Way more bad-ass. Plus, since my car locks and I’m the only one with a key it’s like leaving tens of thousands of dollars in a safe deposit box I can carry around with me. No one ever steals decks out of cars. How could they? Couldn’t happen, especially since I live in San Francisco.”
Due to its intimidating size, many LGS’ are having to alter their operations.
“Every Commander Night on Saturday people roll these things in like they’re a band shlepping their gear,” said a guy who claimed to work at Grandmaster Games in Chicago. “We now require all our guests sign wavers. When these things are fully loaded, they weigh a ton. If you’re unfortunate enough to be near one when it topples over, well at least your hobby is Magic: The Gathering because you’re not going to be walking anywhere anytime soon.”
Taking the products unintended use further, scientists—inspired by the “nesting-doll” aspects of this new product—have discovered evidence that our universe might be encased in an increasingly larger series of 10-compartment organizers. “If we’re right about this, it’s Stanley 10-Compartment Organizers all the way down.”